and I wake in the night at the least sound

in fear of what my life and my children's lives may be,

I go and lie down where the wood drake

rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.

I come into the peace of wild things

who do not tax their lives with forethought

of grief. I come into the presence of still water.

And I feel above me the day-blind stars

waiting for their light. For a time

I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.

Wendell Berry

They had been best of friends, the very best. Despite the fact that Makeila had gone to Public (private for those who don't know the British system) school and Martin had gone to the local state comprehensive. Their houses were the only ones on their lane but despite the large size of both plots, separated only by the two driveways. Makeila would often eat at Martin's, glad to escape the strictness of her own parents. All that had changed shortly before their eighteenth birthdays.

Makeila believed that they should have been born on the same day in October but for some reason she was never told, her birth had been induced at the hospital and she was born two hours before her best friend rather than what she believed destiny intended.

Then, one day she was robbed of her haven. Martin's parents along with his younger sister were killed in a car crash. The brakes on a big articulated lorry had failed and their car was crushed at the junction, killing all three of them. Makeila's parents had refused to let her attend the funeral so she had bunked off school to do so. She was grounded for a fortnight, not even allowed to see her friends from her own school, never mind Martin whom she really worried about.

It was a week after her grounding expired, she saw him from her bedroom, walking through his back garden towards the woods which abutted both of their properties. She had been forbidden to visit his home and this hurt her more than words could say. It hurt both of them and the only reason they were able to maintain any contact was social media which fortunately her parents did not understand.

She quickly dressed and followed him at a distance towards the pond where they had sat and watched the animals that frequented the woods so many times when younger. Till he reached the pond and sat down, Makeila worried that he might even be contemplating killing himself but he sat on the ground maybe eight feet from the water. She stood back watching, tempted to do more and go and sit with him but something held her back.

Makeila waited and saw a young doe slowly walk towards him and then between Martin and the water as it came to drink. "The peace of wild things." she thought, remembering the poem she had studied for A level English. Relief that he was getting some comfort pushed away a brief surge of jealousy and that it should be her looking after him. She returned home in time for breakfast with the parents she sometimes wished had been the ones to die.

This continued for the next five days. Each day the young deer would get closer to the grieving boy and in her head Makeila started to rewrite the essay she had written about the poem, sure that her personal knowledge now would have pushed her grade from an A to an A star.

On the sixth day, she was up early, waiting for Martin to appear. As she did so, she wondered if her parents were afraid Martin's tragedy would somehow infect them or maybe even they knew that she wanted to make love to him to take away the pain he felt for his loss and if honest her own pain as well. She dismissed that last thought. There was no way her parents were sensitive or empathetic enough to discern that.

She slipped out of the back door, smiling that her parents thought her early morning walks meant she had gotten over her angry outburst at their restrictions. Again she followed Martin, remembering the game they played, seeing who could get closest to the other who would sit with eyes shut, trying to hear them. Makeila utilised every skill she had learned from the game as she followed him. Again he sat down, watching and waiting. Again the doe came almost as if summoned by Martin's grief. Again she drank but instead of waiting a minute before walking away she walked up to him, pushed her legs against his body and nuzzled his head for perhaps five minutes before she left.

Makeila felt the tears running down her face as she watched in amazement. This time it was wonder that pushed away the jealous feelings and also gave her the resolve to do what she had wanted to ever since the accident.

Makeila undressed and barefoot walked silently to where Martin sat unmoving. From behind, she wrapped her arms around his body, hugging it tight against her own. She slipped her hands down to the hem of his t-shirt, and lifted it. Seconds later after removing his shoes, they both stood to make removing his trousers and underpants easier. Then they kissed.

That day at their respective summer jobs before they would both be heading to Newcastle University their colleagues remarked on how much happier they both looked.

Late that afternoon, on returning to their lane, Makeila saw that all her belongings had been dumped outside of Martin's front door. Without hesitation she walked down the left hand driveway to await his return.

In what had until that morning been her home, Makeila's mother remarked,

"You were right. She always was a wild thing."

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