THH: Chapter 02 - The Fish Tank
The fluorescent light flickered in the windowless bathroom before finally brightening after a long moment. Its stark white glow made the yellowed white tiles appear even more damp and gloomy.
Chaoxi glanced up at the ceiling, then hurriedly stripped off his pajamas and underwear. His hands were sticky with the shameful residue of semen.
Perhaps his mind had gone awry from too much boredom - he’d actually had such a bizarre and eerie wet dream, even masturbating in his sleep… Chaoxi turned on the faucet to wash his hands, frowning at his reflection in the mirror. He’d never had a history of sleepwalking.
“How pathetic, Li Chaoxi. Are you that desperate?”
After muttering to himself and finishing washing his hands, Chaoxi noticed his body still felt sticky, as if a thin layer of moisture clung to his skin. It had been like this for days - he often found tacky traces on himself. He ran his hands over his body, where small bluish-purple spots scattered across his skin, extending into his pubic hair.
They looked like insect bites but didn’t itch.
Chaoxi had considered asking Shen Hui to take a look, but the thought of exposing his lower body to the very person from his wet dream made him dismiss the idea.
He was afraid Shen Hui would laugh at him.
Just remembering how Shen Hui had gripped his legs in the dream made Chaoxi’s entire body flush with heat, his inner depths tightening faintly.
“What am I even doing?” Chaoxi shook his head, cutting off his own internal monologue.
Maybe all he needed was a dehumidifier and a way to renovate and thoroughly clean this old dorm room. Chaoxi stepped into the bathtub, turning on the showerhead to rinse off quickly before heading to work. But as soon as he turned it on, the showerhead sputtered and sprayed out streams of thick, milky-white water. Chaoxi nearly slipped and fell in the tub, the sticky, cloudy liquid covering his body. It smelled sweet and fishy, almost like…
Chaoxi hurriedly wiped the slimy fluid from his face. When he looked up again, the water had returned to normal. Warm water poured steadily from the showerhead as if nothing had happened, washing away the mucus on his body.
What was that? Mold buildup? Chaoxi stared, puzzled, as the liquid slid off his fingertips, feeling nauseated as he began washing himself.
Probably just old pipes. It seemed the entire bathroom needed replacing, Chaoxi told himself.
He ended up showering three times before he could somewhat shake off the disgust of being sprayed with strange liquid first thing in the morning.
For breakfast, he drank coffee and ate the eggs Village Chief Huang had given him, along with a few slices of toast. The bizarre wet dream that had frightened him last night still troubled him intermittently.
Distractedly, Chaoxi opened the window to let sunlight into the room, but unfortunately, it was gloomy outside today. Thick, pale purple clouds gathered overhead, as if heavy rain could start at any moment.
The damp air made Chaoxi frown. A drop of water fell from above, splashing onto his cheek. Chaoxi touched his face - it was that same repulsive stickiness. He pulled his head back inside, closing the window and drawing the curtains.
Not in the best mood, another new day had begun.
As usual, Chaoxi rode his bicycle to the police station, wondering how much longer until his next day off to go down the mountain. How many days had he been on duty now?
But before he could calculate the exact date, Chaoxi noticed that Dusk Village today was quieter and more silent than ever before.
The villagers who should have been working in the fields at this hour were nowhere to be seen.
The fields remained lush and green, but there was no one in sight.
Chaoxi had just arrived at the police station when he found the answer. The villagers, wearing conical hats, along with Village Chief Huang, were gathered in front of the station. Each of them faced the station, their backs turned to him, standing motionless and arranged in neat, orderly rows.
Chaoxi braked sharply, the screeching sound finally causing the villagers to turn around. Their movements were eerily synchronized.
Brushing away the goosebumps on his neck, Chaoxi quickly dismounted his bicycle and asked, "What's going on?"
"We're here to file a report, Officer Li," Village Chief Huang said, stepping forward with a squinting smile.
Such a grand display just to file a report? Chaoxi glanced at the villagers. Aside from Village Chief Huang, everyone stared at him expressionlessly, their faces blank and their dull, sunken eyes unmoving.
"A report?" Chaoxi forced himself to focus on Village Chief Huang.
"Officer Li, this is Uncle Axian," Village Chief Huang called over one of the elderly men wearing a conical hat. His face was similarly wrinkled and dry, his head shaped as if it had been kneaded unevenly, with features that were sparse and flat.
Chaoxi had been here for a few days now, but he still found himself sometimes unable to remember the villagers' faces. He could recall their names, nicknames, even who was married to whom, but if asked what someone looked like, he simply couldn't picture them.
Uncle Axian stood before him, mouth agape as if trying to speak but unable to form words.
"You know Uncle Axian's wife, Xiufen, right? They often farm near your dormitory, the one who greets you in the mornings," Village Chief Huang continued, his smile unwavering.
Chaoxi remembered the elderly woman who always stood in the fields wearing a conical hat and greeted him in the mornings. He hadn't seen her for the past two days.
"Axian says she went into the woods to gather bamboo shoots yesterday and never returned. She was gone all night," Village Chief Huang said with a laugh, patting Uncle Axian gently on the back.
Uncle Axian opened his mouth, his few remaining teeth making him look like a fledgling bird begging for food as he let out a few "ah, ah, ah" sounds. Then, his flat face crumpled, and he burst into loud, wailing sobs.
"It's alright, it's alright, don't worry. Officer Li will help us find Xiufen," Village Chief Huang continued to smile, comforting Uncle Axian with concern before looking up at Chaoxi.
All of them were staring at Chaoxi, including Uncle Axian, who had just been wailing inconsolably. Despite his heartbroken appearance, there were no tear stains on his face. Like the other villagers, he smelled of earth.
Chaoxi's stomach churned, a sudden wave of nausea washing over him.
"Right, Officer Li Chaoxi?" Village Chief Huang called back his attention.
"Ah... yes," Chaoxi clenched his fists, inwardly scolding himself for the feeling that had just surfaced.
He comforted the tearless Uncle Axian, "Don't worry, Uncle Axian, we'll find Aunt Xiufen."
Uncle Axian rubbed his eyes and nodded repeatedly, continuing to make choked sobbing sounds, but it was as if all the moisture in his body had been drained - not a single tear could be squeezed out.
"Yes, yes, we'll help," the villagers chimed in one after another.
Watching the scene before him, a sense of detachment lingered ambiguously in Chaoxi's mind. He couldn't shake the feeling that he was participating in a poorly performed play.
But thinking this way was truly too much. Chaoxi felt that he was the one who was truly clumsy. He shook his head - now was not the time to dwell on such thoughts.
Soon, Chaoxi began investigating the areas Aunt Xiufen frequently visited among the villagers and organized teams to search for her.
Suddenly, the day became busy.
As he prepared to go out searching for Aunt Xiufen with a flashlight and raincoat, Chaoxi remembered how just yesterday he had complained to Shen Hui about having nothing to do at the police station and feeling utterly idle. He never expected something would happen today. He really shouldn’t have spoken carelessly.
“Great, we finally have something to do,” Village Chief Huang said with a beaming smile to Chaoxi before they left.
Rain began to fall from the sky.
Chaoxi wiped the rainwater from his face. Whether it was the lingering effects of last night’s nightmare or the shadow of being frightened by the filth in the showerhead this morning, he couldn’t help but feel that even the rain in the village smelled fishy and felt sticky to the touch.
Today’s weather was a stark contrast to the clear skies of the past two days. The dark, thick clouds loomed overhead, and the raindrops fell heavily and urgently. Early in the morning, they had to don heavy raincoats and boots, and everyone carried a flashlight to navigate through the forest smoothly.
The villagers enthusiastically gathered to help search for the missing Aunt Xiufen. Chaoxi divided the group of thin, elderly villagers into several teams to conduct the search.
The villagers cooperated well with Chaoxi’s instructions, but the lively atmosphere made him somewhat uneasy. It was as if everyone was relieved to finally have something else to do, seeing him busy as a result.
'Great, we finally have something to do.'
Not only Village Chief Huang had said this to him, but almost every villager he met would utter the same phrase.
The most painful part of work is having nothing to do, so having something to do is naturally good. Yet, no matter how Chaoxi thought about it, it felt inappropriate. How could someone’s disappearance be described as a good thing?
Chaoxi followed Uncle Axian to the area where Aunt Xiufen usually gathered bamboo shoots to search for her.
Calls for Aunt Xiufen’s name echoed through the forest. Uncle Axian shouted the most vigorously, but each call sounded devoid of emotion, without a trace of anxiety or sorrow, like a repeatedly played answering machine.
Maybe they were just tired, or perhaps some people were naturally like this.
“Xiufen - Zhang Xiufen-” Chaoxi joined in the calls. Every time he shouted, the villagers would follow suit.
The bamboo forest was dark, damp, and cold on this rainy day. The crisscrossing bamboo branches resembled human arms, and occasionally, their shadows could be mistaken for people. They had to use flashlights to search carefully.
The rain poured down in torrents, sometimes heavy, sometimes light, and the temperature was so cold that even a grown man like him began to shiver.
“I’m really worried Aunt Xiufen won’t make it through such heavy rain. We need to hurry,” Chaoxi said anxiously to Village Chief Huang beside him as he shone his flashlight on the grass on the ground.
Village Chief Huang nodded. His conical hat obscured his face, making his expression invisible. He was doing the same thing as Chaoxi. It might have been just a coincidence, but when Chaoxi aimlessly shone his flashlight in a certain direction, Village Chief Huang did the same, as did the other villagers following him.
It was as if they were mimicking his actions.
Chaoxi swallowed hard, suppressing a wave of nausea, and continued speaking to himself, “Perhaps we should consider going down the mountain to seek help.”
"Go down the mountain?" Village Chief Huang said, "Down the mountain, down the mountain, down the mountain." Like a skipping record.
"Right, if we still haven't found her by dusk." Chaoxi looked at Village Chief Huang. He and the villagers were all bowing their heads, a sea of conical hats facing him, no one lifting their heads to speak to him.
Chaoxi felt cold again. He didn't like this feeling. He called out, "Village Chief Huang?"
Only then did Village Chief Huang slowly raise his head. Chaoxi was afraid he'd see a livid face, but beneath the conical hat was just that wrinkled, withered face, wearing a kindly, amiable smile.
"Let's put in a bit more effort to search. We'll definitely find her before dusk," Village Chief Huang said to Chaoxi.
The villagers behind him nodded in agreement, and everyone started moving again. For a moment, the bamboo grove was filled with the beams of flashlights.
The shouts rose and fell once more. Chaoxi didn't say much else, just privately planned to contact people down the mountain for backup. How long had it been since he last contacted his colleagues?
Chaoxi's memory was like watercolor paint smudged on paper. Just as he was seriously trying to recall, he suddenly noticed several patches of flattened grass behind the bamboo grove, as if someone had passed through.
This was it. Chaoxi's spirits lifted. Following those footprints, he ventured deeper into the woods. It seemed as if heaven was helping him too - the rain stopped just then, making it easier for him to see the clues.
Chaoxi followed the footprints, only to end up circling within the woods.
If those were Aunt Xiufen's footprints, that would be really strange, Chaoxi thought, because he was following the old woman's steps, wandering aimlessly through the woods, meaninglessly tracing figure eights around a few tall trees.
When Chaoxi returned to his starting point again, he felt confused. Because along the way, he hadn't seen any footprints leading out of the woods. So either Aunt Xiufen had circled around and then turned into a bird and flown away, or she was still inside.
Maybe he'd missed something. Chaoxi entered the woods again, but the more he circled, the more something felt off. He lowered his head, staring at the flattened, muddy ground beneath him, and stepped onto it.
His foot looked so small in that hollow. It seemed like a very, very large footprint. Could Aunt Xiufen's feet really be that exaggeratedly big?
No matter how he thought about it, it was impossible...
Chaoxi stood with his head bowed in the mud, frowning. An idea surfaced in his mind: leave.
Taking a deep breath, Chaoxi turned to leave, but his gaze caught sight of a conical hat he hadn't noticed at all before, now hanging conspicuously on a tree branch.
The conical hat dangled from a withered branch, right about at Chaoxi's head height. He should have noticed it when he passed by, but he truly hadn't seen it earlier.
Chaoxi walked toward the tree with the hanging conical hat. He glanced at it - the hat only had a few water droplets on it, as if it had just been placed there.
He took down the conical hat but noticed a hole in the tree trunk. After he removed the hat, perhaps wind blew into it, making a strange, wailing sound, like a person crying.
Chaoxi knocked on the tree trunk. The wood sounded hollow; the tree was completely dead.
The tree hole wailed again, sounding too much like a human voice, making Chaoxi unable to resist continuing to knock randomly along the trunk.
Knock, knock, thud. Near the rotting roots, it sounded solid.
Chaoxi frowned, shining his flashlight around the tree trunk carefully. When the light hit a severely decayed large hole at the base of the tree, a pale face covered in muddy water and cloudy eyes were revealed inside.
At first, Chaoxi thought someone had casually stuffed an old doll into the tree trunk, until one of those eyes rotated in its socket and its gaze settled on his face.
Chaoxi jerked his hand back in fright, stumbling and falling with the flashlight onto the muddy grass.
"Wuwu..." The tree hole continued to make sounds.
Chaoxi stared at the mud-covered person in the tree hole. Aunt Xiufen, whom they had been searching for all morning, was crammed inside the tree hole, folded up like a dirty rag doll and stuffed into a trunk space even a child would struggle to hide in.
Chaoxi's hands were still trembling as he sat on a chair, covered in mud. His pants, soaked with moisture, dripped water onto the clean white tiles, forming dirty puddles.
The image of the old woman crammed into the tree hole remained vivid in his mind - folded in half in an unnatural position, chest pressed against thighs, perfectly fitted into the hollowed-out tree branch.
Chaoxi wiped his face. When he and the villagers worked together to drag Aunt Xiufen out of the tree trunk, he had worried she might tear apart, her organs and intestines spilling out like stuffing from a doll, scattering across the ground.
Fortunately, that didn't happen. Aunt Xiufen was still alive, though covered in scrapes and bruises. She seemed mostly dazed, spending most of her time just staring at Chaoxi without saying a word.
When he saw his wife had been found, Uncle Axian cried out "Wah! Wah!" without shedding a single tear, patting Chaoxi's back and even giving him a hug.
The villagers applauded and cheered beside them, like a bunch of rowdy monkeys.
The atmosphere was unnerving to the point of being almost eerie, but Chaoxi didn't have time to dwell on it. He hurriedly carried Aunt Xiufen back to the village to find Shen Hui.
Shen Hui proved especially precious and reliable at that moment. When Chaoxi, covered in filth, carried the nearly weightless Aunt Xiufen to him, Shen Hui didn't act confused like the other villagers. Instead, he immediately took Aunt Xiufen and brought her into a room for treatment.
Meanwhile, Village Chief Huang was still patting his shoulder, saying, "This is truly wonderful. You found Aunt Xiufen. So reliable - Dusk Village can't do without you."
Chaoxi felt deeply uncomfortable. For Village Chief Huang and the villagers, praising him seemed far more important than their own friends and relatives. But of course, Chaoxi said nothing. It seemed too harsh to call the villagers maliciou - perhaps they just didn't know how to react.
Shen Hui's small clinic was warm. Inside, it didn't feel so cold anymore. At one point, Shen Hui came out once without saying anything, simply handing Chaoxi a thin blanket. Chaoxi was very grateful for this.
Sitting beside him was Uncle Axian, a thin, hunched old man with a vacant stare fixed on the wall. Every few seconds, he would reach up and scratch his face. This action itself wasn't unusual, but when Chaoxi noticed how rhythmic it was - repeating constantly as if programmed - he couldn't help but fixate on it.
Chaoxi wiped his face again, thinking his own paranoia was idiotic.
No longer observing Uncle Axian's behavior, Chaoxi turned to look around the small clinic: white walls, wood-toned decor, warm lighting, and a fish tank on the table.
Chaoxi hadn't noticed the fish tank earlier because he had been shamelessly busy exchanging flirtatious glances with Shen Hui.
Inside the small fish tank, a beautiful little fish swam leisurely, surrounded by fake aquatic plants, with a cute little house at the bottom. It seemed the doctor was taking good care of the fish.
Chaoxi stared at the fish tank, where a few tiny plastic toy fish floated on the surface. He wondered if Shen Hui had placed them there, worried the fish might feel lonely...
Speak of the devil. Chaoxi turned around to see Shen Hui walking out of the room, drying his hands with a towel.
"How is Aunt Xiufen?" Chaoxi asked.
Uncle A-xian beside them was still staring at the wall.
"She has some minor scrapes and hypothermia, but overall, she's fine. Thanks to you finding her so quickly, otherwise who knows how long an elderly person could hold on." Shen Hui smiled gently, glancing at Uncle A-xian.
"Xiufen... Xiufen!" Uncle A-xian seemed to remember his wife only then. He hurriedly stood up, thanked Shen Hui, and went into the small room.
Through the open door, Chaoxi saw Aunt Xiufen sitting upright on the sickbed, surprisingly straight, and she even looked quite alert.
Just as Shen Hui had said, aside from still appearing somewhat unwell, she only seemed to have minor scrapes.
Uncle A-xian knelt by Aunt Xiufen's feet, repeatedly saying, "Thank goodness, thank goodness." Aunt Xiufen, however, stared blankly at the wall, then turned her gaze toward Chaoxi.
Chaoxi was taken aback, but the door was promptly closed by Shen Hui.
"She seems to be in pretty good condition..." Chaoxi said dazedly, somewhat incredulous. He looked at Shen Hui, shadows still clouding his mind. "Do you know that when I found Aunt Xiufen, she was stuffed inside a tree trunk? The trunk was so narrow, and she's an elderly woman - her body was almost folded in half. I thought..."
"It's fine, she's fine." Shen Hui walked up to Chaoxi, crouched down, and comforted him. "You saw it - I fixed her up."
Shen Hui's voice was so gentle, so soothing, yet Chaoxi was still puzzled by his use of the word "fixed," as if Aunt Xiufen were just a doll in need of mending.
"Are you underestimating the elderly? The old folks here have very flexible joints. They've been farming since childhood, so their physical condition is definitely better than you think." Shen Hui brushed it off with a lighthearted laugh, reaching out to pat Chaoxi's knee, easing the tension that had built up.
"I really don't understand how Aunt Xiufen got inside there." Chaoxi looked at Shen Hui, who was crouched before him, utterly perplexed. "She looked like she was stuffed in. Did she say how she got inside?"
Shen Hui shook his head. "The elderly lady was probably frightened, so she isn't talking much."
"I see..." Chaoxi lowered his head, looking at the large hand resting on his knee. Warmth seeped through the damp, cold fabric.
"Don't overthink it either. Aunt Xiufen is getting old - it's likely her mind is deteriorating, causing dementia. She probably had an episode while picking bamboo shoots." Shen Hui explained. "She might have lost her way home for a moment, and with the rain, she crawled into the tree trunk, mistaking it for shelter from the storm."
But that still didn't explain why she looked like she had been stuffed inside. Chaoxi thought to himself. The dream from that night surfaced in his mind - the enormous black shadow creature, clutching a doll wearing a conical hat. Could it be that the doll was...
"There are many elderly folks in Dusk Village, and this sort of thing isn't the first time it's happened. Once, someone was found hanging from a tree after an entire night had passed." Shen Hui gently rubbed Chaoxi's knee with his palm.
"Really. So this place isn't as boring as you imagined, right? When the elderly run into trouble, the rush to help can be quite overwhelming."
"Yeah..." Chaoxi covered his face with his hands. He really was overthinking things.
"It's a good thing you're here, reliable Officer," Shen Hui said, his hand moving upward to gently pinch Chaoxi's thigh.
Chaoxi lifted his face, his lower abdomen tightening for a second. He stared at Shen Hui's impossibly handsome face, those purple eyes appearing both eerie and beautiful under the light, distracting him.
He recalled last night's erotic dream - Shen Hui parting his legs and nestling into his embrace, just like now...
"Chaoxi?" Shen Hui tilted his head, looking at him with amusement.
"S-sorry, your eyes are just so distracting. It feels like my soul is about to be sucked right out," Chaoxi joked. Shen Hui played along, his eyes crinkling into a smile.
"People say that often," Shen Hui patted Chaoxi's thigh.
Chaoxi glanced worriedly at his crotch, closing his legs as Shen Hui stood up, and casually changed the subject: "As much as I hate being idle, it's better if things like this happen less often."
"Bored when you're free, overwhelmed when you're busy - you really are hard to please," Shen Hui reached out and affectionately hooked a finger under Chaoxi's nose.
Chaoxi rubbed his nose, feeling ashamed of the brief tightening deep in his abdomen.
"If Aunt Xiufen is okay, then I should probably head back," Chaoxi made to stand up, but Shen Hui draped a towel over his head, wiping away the rain and grime.
"Why not take a hot shower first? You look freezing and absolutely filthy," Shen Hui said.
With his hair being roughly towel-dried, Chaoxi couldn't stand up immediately. And the moment Shen Hui mentioned he was cold, his body, which had just started to warm up, began to shiver.
He suddenly felt so cold, an aching chill that seeped into his bones.
Shen Hui cupped Chaoxi's face. Chaoxi gazed into his eyes - beautiful irises like purple marbles. His mouth went dry, his heart trembling along with his body.
Hot water cascaded over his head, and Chaoxi felt as if he had come back to life.
Unlike the small, windowless, damp, and dim bathroom in his dorm, Shen Hui's bathroom was spacious and bright, with ample hot water and a clean bathtub.
After washing away the filth from his body, Chaoxi immersed himself in the bathtub filled with hot water. The tension from the earlier shock gradually eased in the comforting warmth.
Chaoxi gently stirred the hot water in the tub. Though the texture still felt oddly slippery, he had nothing left to complain about.
Touching his own face, he recalled the shiver that ran through his body when Shen Hui had cupped it earlier, and felt embarrassed. Thankfully, Shen Hui didn't seem to have noticed. If he knew Chaoxi was constantly fantasizing about him, even turning him into the lead in bizarre erotic dreams, Chaoxi wondered if they could still remain friends.
It must just be loneliness, Chaoxi told himself silently. He stared blankly at the wall, deciding to close his eyes and stop thinking about it.
The horrifying image of Aunt Xiufen stuffed into the tree trunk was no longer so vivid. Though strange, after Shen Hui explained that Aunt Xiufen might have been confused due to dementia or some acute delirium, which led her to stuff herself inside, the whole thing didn't seem as terrifying anymore.
Chaoxi remembered back when he was still a police officer in the city - he had actually encountered similar situations before.
Such incidents. An elderly person goes missing in the middle of the night, walking barefoot for over ten kilometers to a completely unfamiliar place, only to be found in a filthy trash bin; or suddenly vanishing from home, discovered days later in the water tank on the roof of their own building...
Back then, Chaoxi was still a rookie, but fortunately, his partner was experienced and steady.
〝Don’t be nervous, don’t scare yourself, Xiao Xi.〞
A man’s gentle voice echoed in his mind, and Chaoxi recalled how someone had comforted him after a bizarre case. The man’s handsome face wore a kind smile - he always smiled at Chaoxi, looking so relaxed and carefree, so reassuring. It seemed nothing could ever break this man, but...
Before the handsome face in his memory began to swell and turn purple, Chaoxi opened his eyes. He sat up and splashed hot water on his face. He kept rubbing his stinging eyes, irritated by the water, when something suddenly brushed against the sole of his foot.
"Ugh!" Chaoxi jerked his foot back, staring into the rippling water below. Nothing.
He was really getting more and more jumpy.
Chaoxi shook his head and was about to stand up when his foot was yanked hard again. A cold sweat broke out all over his body as he looked into the bathtub - the hot water had turned pitch black, appearing bottomless.
Instinctively, he scrambled out of the bathtub to escape, but something from inside wrapped around his ankle and dragged him back into the water. Chaoxi struggled but was pulled deeper and deeper. The bathtub was clearly shallow, yet he felt as if he were being dragged into the depths of the ocean, surrounded by darkness, unable to see anything.
Chaoxi tried to swim upward but only sank further. What truly terrified him, however, was the feeling that something was hiding in the darkness - something massive, unnervingly massive.
Chaoxi couldn’t see it; it was just a feeling. There was no scent or sound, yet his primal instincts told him that some enormous entity was pressed right in front of him, observing him in the darkness.
Chaoxi couldn’t breathe. The thing wrapped around his ankle coiled up his legs, and even as he clenched them tightly, it continued to slither between them.
Slippery, sticky tentacles clung like octopus suckers, the intense tugging hurting his skin. Chaoxi struggled, but his limbs were pulled apart. He tensed his thighs and buttocks in panic as the thing began to burrow into the crevice between his buttocks.
Chaoxi cried out, water flooding his nose and mouth. He closed his eyes in agony, then with one final effort, lifted his face upward.
Light returned. Chaoxi clung to the edge of the bathtub, sitting perfectly fine inside. The hot water was clear, and he was alone in the tub - no other strange things in sight.
Still shaken, Chaoxi wiped the water from his face until someone knocked on the bathroom door.
"Are you alright, Li Chaoxi?" It was Shen Hui’s voice.
"I’m fine! I’m coming out!" Chaoxi practically tumbled out of the bathtub, not even caring that he was still naked. He opened the door to find Shen Hui standing outside, holding a towel.
"Did something happen?" Shen Hui stared at him, looking concerned.
"Just now, inside..." Chaoxi pointed toward the bathroom.
The bathroom was brightly lit, the bathwater clear, with only a faint trace of steam lingering.
"What's wrong? Are there cockroaches or something in my bathroom?" Shen Hui asked with a look of alarm, apologetically calling out, "Sorry, I make sure to clean thoroughly every day."
"No, it's not that. I just..."
"Had another nightmare?" Shen Hui inquired gently.
"Yeah, you might have fallen asleep. You were in there for so long that I started to worry something had happened to you, so I came to knock and check on you."
"But I was only in there for a little while..."
As Chaoxi turned his head, he noticed the sky outside the window had already grown completely dark. Had it really gotten dark just from him taking a bath?
"Almost dinnertime," Shen Hui replied vaguely.
Chaoxi rubbed his temples. He distinctly remembered it had only just passed noon when he returned, yet the time he spent in the bath felt as if it had been completely severed. How deeply had he slept?
Chaoxi shook his head, water droplets falling to the floor. He stared at the puddles on the ground and his own toes when suddenly, that feeling of being watched by something crept over him again.
He looked up, only to meet Shen Hui's gaze.
Those purple eyes were fixed on his lower abdomen, even lingering on his genitals nestled among the hair. The obvious stare made Chaoxi belatedly realize he was standing there completely naked.
"Great figure, Officer," Shen Hui whistled at just the right moment, breaking the awkward and strange tension.
Chaoxi flushed with embarrassment, about to search for something to cover himself, when a dry towel was already draped over his head.
"Though I don't mind, staying naked might give you a cold," Shen Hui said naturally, beginning to dry Chaoxi's hair for him.
"Sorry, I don't know how I... slept so deeply I lost track."
Giving up the struggle, Chaoxi let Shen Hui towel his hair.
It felt too real to be just a nightmare, but Chaoxi nodded anyway. The doctor's words couldn't be wrong.
"You must have been exhausted from searching for Aunt Xiufen today," Shen Hui smiled, thoughtfully offering Chaoxi a reasonable explanation. He wrapped him in the towel and handed him clean clothes to change into.
Wrapped in the towel, Chaoxi looked up at the other man sheepishly.
"By the way, how about having dinner here tonight?" Shen Hui suggested.
"I couldn't possibly impose..." Almost at the same time, Chaoxi caught the aroma of food. His stomach growled, and saliva pooled in his mouth. He missed Shen Hui's cooking deeply - like a well-trained puppy, conditioned by Shen Hui to crave food as soon as mealtime arrived.
Chaoxi had missed out on his lunch today.
"Don't be polite. It's my responsibility to feed you - didn't we agree on that?" Shen Hui crossed his arms, leaning against the doorframe. He didn't avert his gaze even as Chaoxi dried himself. "Besides, it's an honor to cook for our hero."
Chaoxi's words drew a laugh from Shen Hui, sending a ticklish sensation through his abdomen. Chaoxi hoped his face wasn't too red.
Turning his back to Shen Hui, he dressed as quickly as possible, all the while feeling as if Shen Hui's eyes were still glued to him.
But when he turned around, the other man had already walked away.
Shen Hui stood at the end of the hallway, beckoning to him. His figure appeared dark and elongated in the narrow, dimly lit corridor.
Chaoxi ignored that familiar sense of déjà vu and quickly followed, but the splattering sound outside the window caught his attention. The sky wasn’t just dark - it was tinged with a gloomy purple, and it seemed heavy rain had started pouring again outside.
He hoped the rain would stop later. He didn’t want to return to his damp, cold little dormitory soaked through, only to face those strange dreams alone again.
Chaoxi glanced back at the bathroom. Under the light, it appeared bright and clean, with nothing inside.
Don’t be nervous, don’t scare yourself. Chaoxi repeated in his mind the words Sunshine had once used to comfort him, when a large hand suddenly pressed against the back of his neck.
Pressed forward by the hand on his neck, Chaoxi nearly stumbled into the other’s embrace.
“What are you still looking at? Didn’t you say it’s time to eat?”
Chaoxi looked up. Backlit, Shen Hui appeared imposing, his voice flat and steady. For a moment, it sounded devoid of emotion, almost inhuman.
Chaoxi liked Shen Hui - was even deeply drawn to him. Shen Hui was handsome and gentle, but the occasional look in his eyes or the steadiness of his voice would make Chaoxi tense.
Sometimes, Shen Hui didn’t seem so warm. Instead, he felt like this mountain, this village - damp and chilly.
Shen Hui’s other hand rested lightly on Chaoxi’s abdomen.
Chaoxi’s hairs stood on end one by one, as fear and a sense of alienation crept over him for no reason.
He looked up and met Shen Hui’s gaze. For a moment, he actually worried that the other might turn into something else - like the enormous black shadow creature that haunted him in his dreams, clinging to him on the mountain peak.
Breaking this silence and meaningless suspicion was the sound from Chaoxi’s stomach - his gut rumbling.
Shen Hui laughed, the familiar gentleness returning to his face, proving that Chaoxi had just been overthinking again. He really worried that if this continued, he might go mad. Perhaps it was time to find a chance to go down the mountain and see a psychologist.
“Come eat. It’s not good to be hungry.” The hand gripping the back of Chaoxi’s neck finally released, and Shen Hui placed his hand on Chaoxi’s shoulder, warmly ushering him into the dining area.
Shen Hui’s home was typically small but fully equipped. The front housed the clinic and patient rooms, while the back was his living quarters. Every necessary area was present in the small dormitory; he had even managed to squeeze out a cozy little dining space.
Chaoxi sat at the dining table, faced with a spread of hot dishes. The pendant lamp was warm and bright, and the surroundings were filled with a cozy yet indistinct feeling - a strange warmth he found hard to describe.
Chaoxi only felt as if his brain had been relaxed by some kind of anesthetic.
“How are you so good at cooking?” Chaoxi watched as Shen Hui served the food. The aroma made his mouth water, eager to dig in.
“Living alone for so long, how could I survive without some cooking skills?” Shen Hui piled a small mountain of white rice into Chaoxi’s bowl.
“I don’t have any. Work in the city is too busy; I almost always rely on convenience stores.” Chaoxi could only make simple things, like fried eggs. He licked his lips, seemingly casually changing the topic: “Speaking of which, have you never had a girlfriend?”
“No.” Shen Hui didn’t look at him, but Chaoxi saw the corner of his mouth curl up.
Waiting for Shen Hui to prepare the chopsticks and spoon, Chaoxi asked another question: “Boyfriend?” The moment the words left his mouth, he regretted it, but there was no taking them back. He scolded himself for asking such a question.
“Not now, either,” Shen Hui replied again.
Chaoxi lowered his head to look at the small mountain of white rice in his bowl, telling himself not to feel happy about such a thing. He picked up his chopsticks, not daring to look up at the other man, and began stuffing the dishes on the table into his mouth. Chaoxi mumbled indistinctly, "How could that be? You're so good-looking, and a doctor too."
The glossy stir-fried leeks and pork liver mixed with rice grains in his mouth tasted delicious, and Chaoxi realized he was truly hungry.
"Just not very interested, I suppose. In most humans," Shen Hui said, his tone flat once again.
Chaoxi found it amusing how Shen Hui used the word "humans." Before he could finish swallowing the food in his mouth, several more hot dishes were added to his bowl. He glanced up at the man who had served him - Shen Hui seemed determined to fatten him up.
"But I find you quite interesting, Li Chaoxi," Shen Hui said with a smile, making it hard to tell how sincere his words were.
Chaoxi felt he should drop the topic, but curiosity got the better of him. "What's interesting about me? I'm just like everyone else."
"You're vibrant, full of emotions," Shen Hui said. Chaoxi noticed the doctor's bowl was empty.
"Full of emotions?" Chaoxi laughed. "That's the first time I've heard someone say that about me. My colleagues always say I'm very steady and composed..."
"You hide it inside," Shen Hui interrupted, pointing to his chest.
Chaoxi fell silent, his chopsticks pausing. The quiet lingered for a while until Shen Hui served him more food.
"What's with your obsession with fattening me up like a pig?" Chaoxi said, using humor to break the awkwardness.
"Fattening you up a bit will give you the energy and a strong body for the tasks ahead," Shen Hui ignored his remark, continuing to pile glossy, fragrant, and hot dishes into Chaoxi's bowl. "I don’t want something like an old man squeezing himself into a tree trunk to happen again."
Shen Hui smiled without saying a word, and Chaoxi, resigned, picked up his chopsticks again.
"Why aren't you eating anything yourself?"
"I've already eaten, so you need to finish all of this."
"Unbelievable. And you say you're not fattening me up like a pig. Did you and the villagers conspire to sacrifice and devour me or something in the future?"
"Something like that, but we won't devour you. I'm too fond of you to eat you," the doctor joked earnestly, clutching his chest and winking at Chaoxi.
Chaoxi laughed to cover his embarrassment, hiding his flushed face. He didn't ask any more questions, instead lowering his head to shovel rice into his mouth, bite after bite, until his stomach was full and round.
After dinner, Chaoxi was about to leave and return to his damp, cold, and shabby little dormitory, but Shen Hui lured him to stay with dessert.
Originally planning to say goodbye after dessert, Chaoxi ended up chatting with Shen Hui late into the night. Chaoxi discovered they shared many common interests. Sometimes, he felt as though the doctor had investigated his preferences - whenever Chaoxi casually mentioned a book, Shen Hui could respond fluently.
What Shen Hui said even aligned perfectly with Chaoxi's own thoughts and feelings, making him suspicious that the other man might have mind-reading abilities.
"Why don't you just stay here tonight?" Shen Hui suggested when Chaoxi was about to leave.
For no apparent reason, Chaoxi instinctively wanted to decline the offer, even though he didn't particularly like his own shabby little dormitory. But before he could refuse, heavier rain began pouring outside, making the road nearly invisible.
"What if something urgent comes up in the village?" Chaoxi was still a bit worried.
"Don’t worry, everyone knows you’re here," Shen Hui said.
Chaoxi hesitated, but Shen Hui had already headed into the room first.
"Come in," he said, his voice sounding like a command, wrapped in the rumbling thunder.
'It would be better to go back.'
This thought lingered in his mind. Chaoxi stood still for a while until Shen Hui poked his head out again, holding a game controller, and said to him, "Want to play a round? Li Chaoxi."
Hearing Shen Hui call his name, Chaoxi relaxed again. He turned to look at the familiar joystick, unsure how long it had been since he last touched such entertainment. He snapped back to reality and nodded at Shen Hui, then turned and followed him into the room.
The moment he stepped into the room, Chaoxi couldn’t understand why he had insisted on going home earlier.
Shen Hui’s room was clean and tidy. Besides the basic furniture, there was a large bed inside. The simple white decor felt familiar to Chaoxi, as if he had seen a similar room before.
"Sit here," Shen Hui said, sitting on a beanbag chair in front of the TV and patting the spot beside him enthusiastically.
Chaoxi walked over and sat down, his thigh almost touching Shen Hui’s. Today, the doctor smelled like flowers and herbs. Chaoxi stared at their pressed-together legs, feeling an inappropriate sense of delight, but he pretended it wasn’t there.
Chaoxi hid his emotions, just as Shen Hui had said...
"Do you know how to play? Zelda," Shen Hui said, shoving the controller into his hands.
That familiar feeling surfaced again - not just a sense of déjà vu, but as if he were reliving days from the past, the days when Rì Huī was still alive.
"I do. I used to play often with a colleague," Chaoxi said.
"Yeah, his name was Rì Huī. He was once my best friend."
"You look a lot like him, you know?" Chaoxi said, unable to stop talking. He suddenly realized why the room felt so familiar - it was very similar to Rì Huī’s room, down to the game they were playing.
Chaoxi stared at Shen Hui, feeling confused.
"So, was he also a drop-dead gorgeous super hunk?" Shen Hui asked, leaning toward Chaoxi as he casually set up the game.
"But what do you mean by ‘once’?" Shen Hui asked casually, almost resting his head on Chaoxi’s shoulder.
Shen Hui’s body warmth made Chaoxi’s throat tighten. He stiffly held the game controller, unsure if he was ready to talk about Rì Huī. As if seeing through his thoughts, Shen Hui reached out and took Chaoxi’s hand, guiding him to operate the controller.
"Let’s start. Move your character, Li Chaoxi."
The game began, and the earlier topic was forgotten. Chaoxi’s character wandered aimlessly through the rain-soaked mountain forest.
Shen Hui isn’t Rì Huī, Chaoxi reminded himself, yet he didn’t move his thigh away from Shen Hui’s.
Shen Rì Huī was Chaoxi’s senior, both in school and during his rookie days at the police station.
Rì Huī was a tall, handsome, reliable, and cheerful man. He never lost his temper with Chaoxi or anyone else when they made mistakes, instead calmly and patiently teaching everyone the right way to do things.
Everyone at the police station liked Rì Huī, and Chaoxi was no exception—except his feelings ran a little deeper.
Chaoxi would notice the little details about Sunshine that no one else paid attention to - like how Sunshine would silently pick at the label on his drink cup with his thumb when he was anxious, how he always deliberately picked out the scallions when eating, how he would clutch his stomach when laughing, and how he was always especially gentle when treating him...
The sunshine seemed to know all his worries, understood his sensitivity and unease, and would stand behind him offering support whenever Chaoxi needed it.
It was hard for Chaoxi not to like Sunshine, not to develop feelings beyond friendship for him. He believed he shared a wonderful rapport with Sunshine; they were partners who understood each other best, connected by a special emotional bond.
"That's what I originally thought…"
The sound of the television being turned off interrupted Chaoxi's thoughts. He groggily lifted his head to see the man who looked so much like Sunshine walking toward him, gently taking the game controller and handing him a cup of hot tea.
Chaoxi stared at the tea in his hand. Its color was somewhat murky, like white muddy water. He looked up in confusion, remembering that just a moment ago they had been playing video games - how had he suddenly started recounting these old memories?
"Drink some hot tea first; it's good for you," the man said, his palm gently stroking Chaoxi's knee, warm and soft. The man's tone was just like Sunshine's.
"Shen Hui," Chaoxi remembered the other's name.
"Yes?" Shen Hui's expression was kind and gentle.
"Why am I telling you all this? It must be boring," Chaoxi wiped his face, unsure of what he was doing.
"It's not boring. I said I enjoy getting to know you," Shen Hui replied, his large hand moving from Chaoxi's knee to pat his thigh lightly, urging him to drink the tea.
Chaoxi gazed at Shen Hui, obediently lowered his head, and took a sip of the hot tea. The tea was strong, with a hint of sweet, fishy flavor and the earthy taste of herbal medicine, but it warmed him as he drank, the heat gathering in his lower abdomen - a strange sensation.
Shen Hui wore a satisfied expression, which made Chaoxi feel light.
"You originally thought that, and then? What happened between you two?" Shen Hui continued to ask.
"I… I noticed my feelings for Rì Huī. I couldn't control them, but I didn't know… if I told him honestly, would it harm our friendship? What if Rì Huī left me because of it?" Chaoxi went on, his ears burning, his body sweating, feeling utterly uncomfortable. It was as if his body was resisting talking about this, yet his mouth couldn't stop.
Shen Hui's beautiful purple eyes were filled with a watery glow, encouraging him to continue.
"I didn't know what to do, so I chose to hide my feelings and interact with him as usual. That way, Rì Huī would still be my closest friend, my best partner. As long as things stayed the same, I was content…"
"Sometimes I really don't know whether to call you hard to satisfy or easy to satisfy," Shen Hui sighed, his gaze fixed on Chaoxi, full of affection.
Chaoxi didn't understand Shen Hui's meaning.
"And then? What happened between you?" Shen Hui pressed on, his expression as if he had heard this story countless times before, yet still urging the storyteller to reveal the climax and the ending.
"And then…" The mug in Chaoxi's hand was taken away by Shen Hui. This time, all he held was Shen Hui's hand. "One day, Rì Huī called me a few times before his shift. I happened to miss the calls, thinking I could talk to him at work."
Chaoxi wiped his face again, beginning to fidget. What followed was the part he least wanted to recall.
He remembered it vividly, that cold and damp weather, like a rainy day in Dusk Village. The heater they had bought together for the police station roared loudly, and the station was unusually quiet, without even a single phone call.
Chaoxi saw the mug Rì Huī always used, placed neatly on the desk alongside his phone - almost too neatly - but Rì Huī himself was nowhere to be seen.
The bad feeling came suddenly, like an instinct, and he just knew something terrible had happened.
Chaoxi remembered standing before the tightly closed door of the break room the next moment, unable to ignore the dark, clutter-like shadow behind the frosted glass. He remembered how loud his heartbeat was, how cold his body felt, and then he reached out and opened the break room door. Something behind it swayed with the movement.
Rì Huī was hanging there, like a decoration. His swollen, bluish face looked both familiar and strange, almost unrecognizable. Rì Huī’s eyes met Chaoxi’s, empty and vacant.
“The memories after that are a bit hazy. I only remember how heavy Rì Huī was - how could one person be so heavy?” Chaoxi said, hanging his head as the memories flashed through his mind like pages being rapidly flipped. “I tried to save him, pressing hard on his chest, but he didn’t respond.”
Someone nearby shouted, over and over.
“I couldn’t save him. Rì Huī just left so suddenly,” Chaoxi said, gripping Shen Hui’s hand tightly. “Rì Huī’s death felt like… he just decided on a whim to end his life today, so he did it, without even a sign or a note to explain.”
Shen Hui squeezed Chaoxi’s hand back firmly.
“Later, when we investigated, we found out that Rì Huī had been struggling with depression all along, but he never mentioned it to his colleagues, or even to me,” Chaoxi said. “It’s hard to imagine someone who usually smiled so brightly could have such a problem. I’d heard Rì Huī complain a few times about the stress of being a police officer, but I thought it was just casual venting between us.”
Chaoxi laughed, but it sounded more like crying.
“I thought our relationship was different from others, but it seems it wasn’t. I didn’t understand Rì Huī at all…” Afterward, Chaoxi felt deeply guilty and despised his own self-importance.
“He kept secrets, and you keep secrets too. Humans…” Shen Hui sighed, playing with Chaoxi’s fingers between his own.
“Sometimes, late at night, I keep thinking - when I was worrying about trivial romantic matters, afraid Rì Huī would leave me, was he suffering from depression? When he called me, was he trying to ask for help? If I had answered the phone, would the outcome have been different?”
Chaoxi had too many questions, but there was no chance for answers anymore.
A drop of water fell on the back of his hand. When Chaoxi snapped back to reality, his eyes were filled with tears, and he hurriedly wiped them away.
“Sorry for rambling on about the past and crying like this. It’s so useless…”
“No need to apologize. I said I like getting to know you. It’s really good that you’re willing to share these hidden emotions,” Shen Hui said without a hint of impatience, his expression genuinely joyful.
Chaoxi looked at Shen Hui. The man squatting between his legs really did resemble Rì Huī. Chaoxi knew it was despicable, but when Shen Hui, with that face, said to him, "Don't blame yourself too much. None of this is your fault."
As if by compensation, Chaoxi breathed a sigh of relief, as though he had been forgiven by Sunshine himself.
Chaoxi didn't know how Shen Hui did it - how those secrets buried deep in his chest were so easily unearthed and laid bare for examination. He should have felt uneasy, vulnerable, or uncomfortable, but at this moment, he only felt relaxed.
"Does it feel better to say it out loud?"
As if reading Chaoxi's thoughts, Shen Hui grinned at him, revealing a row of white teeth.
Chaoxi nodded honestly. In the blink of an eye, tears followed, dripping down. He wanted to wipe them away, but Shen Hui used the pad of his thumb to catch his tears.
The teardrop glistened like a precious crystal on the man's finger. Chaoxi watched as Shen Hui placed his thumb into his mouth, licking the tears with his crimson tongue and sucking them with his thin lips.
It was such an inappropriate gesture. Chaoxi's rationality screamed, but he couldn't look away. Through Shen Hui, Chaoxi could almost taste the saltiness of his own tears.
Shen Hui's voice was both deep and resonant. When Shen Hui called him Xiao Xi, Chaoxi suddenly grew restless. By the time he realized it, he and Shen Hui were already too close, yet Chaoxi didn't want to pull away.
After Rì Huī left, Chaoxi hadn't broken down emotionally or become hysterical. It was just that everyone could see he wasn't himself.
Losing an excellent colleague and partner so suddenly, it was only natural for him to react this way. His superiors and colleagues could understand, but Chaoxi's mourning period was far longer than anyone else's.
Everyone thought it was because Chaoxi and Rì Huī were such good friends, and because he was the first to discover the body, that he was in such deep grief. Only Chaoxi knew it wasn't just that. Rì Huī had never been just a friend to him...
"After that, I could hardly continue working in my original unit. My superiors thought temporarily transferring me to a small rural village like this would be better for my condition. I didn't refuse." Chaoxi looked at Shen Hui before him, speaking in a calm tone. His gaze unconsciously lingered on Shen Hui's lips - those thin, rosy lips.
The shape of those lips was similar to Rì Huī's, beautiful to the point of unreality.
"Good thing you didn't refuse. You even got lost on the way up." As if mimicking Chaoxi's actions, Shen Hui's gaze also rested on Chaoxi's lips. Those violet eyes, like the sky over Dusk Village, conveyed an unmistakable message.
Chaoxi couldn't help but wonder if it was because he himself was showing the same look.
"Lost..." Chaoxi repeated Shen Hui's words. Shen Hui's palm was warm, and it distracted him. "How did you know I got lost?" Chaoxi frowned, trying to focus.
"Yes, Xiao Xi." Shen Hui laughed.
He shouldn't question Shen Hui's words. Chaoxi thought to himself, maybe he really had mentioned it. Recalling the journey up the mountain, he had driven alone. The road to Dusk Village was much farther than he had imagined. He might have gotten lost. Along the way, people told ghost stories, trying to scare him into a better mood, but it only gave Chaoxi nightmares for a while. And then, he...
“So you made it here in the end.” Shen Hui interrupted Chaoxi’s thoughts.
“Yes.” Chaoxi looked at Shen Hui.
Right, he had arrived safely at Dusk Village. Village Chief Huang had come to welcome him, so warmly, but where was the car? Where had he parked the important official vehicle?
“And then you met me.” Shen Hui interrupted Chaoxi’s thoughts again. Chaoxi’s face was forcibly lifted by Shen Hui. “Right?”
Chaoxi’s gaze met Shen Hui’s once more. Shen Hui’s smile was gentle and kind. He thought of Rì Huī - these two men had very similar smiles, which made him nostalgic.
“Then did meeting me make you happy?”
Shen Hui asked again. Chaoxi’s left hand was grasped by his right, their fingers interlacing.
“Yes…” Chaoxi answered honestly. At this moment, he seemed unable to restrain his true feelings: “Because you really, really resemble him.” His throat felt dry, his voice choked.
Shen Hui took a deep breath, pursing his lips. Chaoxi thought Shen Hui might be displeased, but Shen Hui looked like a contented cat.
“Sorry, that must sound strange.”
“Not strange. What matters is that you like it.” Shen Hui’s tone was soft, his gaze never leaving Chaoxi’s face. Shen Hui lifted Chaoxi’s hand to his lips, bowing his head to kiss his fingers.
The soft, damp sensation made Chaoxi tremble. Tiny goosebumps rose on his skin along with warm sweat. He couldn’t think; the sticky feeling from those strange spring dreams at night crept over his body once more.
“Now tell me, you like me, don’t you?” Shen Hui asked in a low voice.
Chaoxi opened his mouth, as if only this could release the heat inside him. The hand gripping the back of his neck pressed his entire body downward until his nose was almost touching Shen Hui’s.
Chaoxi clutched Shen Hui’s clothes with both hands. Shen Hui’s warm breath brushed his face, intimate enough to send shivers down his spine.
Shen Hui asked again, his voice calm and steady.
A rejecting thought sprang up in Chaoxi’s mind again, like some kind of alarm bell, but the voice grew very faint. Instead, he heard a hum escape his own throat, honestly expressing: “I… like you.”
Chaoxi watched as the man’s lips curved into a smile. Though it resembled Rì Huī’s smile, for some reason, what surfaced in Chaoxi’s mind was the image of a massive black shadow creature standing at the far end of the mountain ridge. That black shadow creature kept trembling, approaching him. Its pitch-black face had nothing, yet one could clearly sense a terrifying joy…
Chaoxi gasped sharply, desperately pulling his thoughts back.
“Hmm?” Shen Hui’s responding voice was deep and soft.
“It’s… it’s late… shouldn’t we sleep?” Chaoxi struggled to force the words from his throat. His gaze couldn’t tear away from Shen Hui’s eyes; he felt as if he were drowning in those pools of purple.
That voice still kept bubbling up in his mind, but when Shen Hui, with that face so reminiscent of sunshine, said, “I like you too, Xiao Xi,” Chaoxi trembled.
To say he wasn’t happy would be deceiving himself. This was something he had longed for but never received - Rì Huī couldn’t give it to him, but Shen Hui did. As if knowing exactly what he wanted, Shen Hui always gave it at the right time.
The back of Chaoxi’s neck was pressed forward, and those rosy lips finally kissed him, just as soft, damp, and wonderful as he had imagined.
The voice in his head finally ceased. Chaoxi closed his eyes, and when he opened them again, their lips parted as well. Chaoxi lingered, licking his own lips, and for a moment, only the sound of his and Shen Hui’s breathing remained in the air.
“Let’s not sleep, Li Chaoxi. Let’s do something else, like two humans who like each other…” Shen Hui’s voice danced against Chaoxi’s eardrums, seeping into his mind. “How about it?”
Shen Hui’s tone and volume were so gentle that Chaoxi felt as if he were being cradled and softly coaxed.
“Like each other…” Chaoxi murmured.
“Yes,” Shen Hui said, his eyes shimmering with moisture.
Chaoxi was deeply drawn in. He heard himself say yes, his body leaning forward almost involuntarily. By the time he regained his senses, he had already cupped Shen Hui’s face and kissed him.
He sank into that pool of purple, not even a finger left outside.
Shen Hui let him kiss freely. Chaoxi could feel the man’s arms encircling his waist, lifting him from the sofa.
It was hard to imagine that the seemingly gentle and frail doctor could lift him so effortlessly. Chaoxi couldn’t dwell on it too much - he was laid on the bed, and Shen Hui climbed over him, covering him like a black shadow creature.
Chaoxi found the scene all too familiar. Everything felt just like that night’s dream. Could it be he was dreaming again?
Yet Shen Hui’s fingers gripping his chin reminded him this was no dream. The man’s slender middle and ring fingers slipped into his mouth, gently pinching the tip of his tongue.
Chaoxi looked at Shen Hui. His tongue was held, a slight pain tingling, but his lower body reacted in response.
“Do you like a little pain?” Shen Hui said. He withdrew his saliva-dampened fingers, a transparent, sticky strand of fluid stretching from his fingertips to Chaoxi’s face. “Adorable.”
Chaoxi wiped the saliva from his face with the back of his hand, while Shen Hui removed his shirt in front of him. The man’s skin was a healthy shade of white, his muscle definition reminiscent of magazine models Chaoxi had once seen - provocative, perfect to the point of unreality.
Backlit, Shen Hui appeared tall and imposing, his shadow pressing down on Chaoxi as if bearing weight. Chaoxi felt an inexplicable sense of oppression. Yet Shen Hui’s smiling expression was so tender. He reached out to undress Chaoxi, stripping him until he was completely bare, his body fully exposed before Shen Hui.
Shen Hui extended his index finger, tracing a path down Chaoxi’s chest before lingering on his abdomen.
“You’re truly perfect, Li Chaoxi.”