I'm stepping away for a while

Hello everyone, I know I barely use this kinda blog and it passed a very long time since then. I use this as a backup for my posts in case something goes down.

I am temporarily here to give an update, as I have worried so many. I will be brief about it.

This is not the first time, nor even the last.

When I last posted, I wasn't in a good condition (mentally speaking), not even until today. I’m struggling with anxiety and depression since my childhood and since then I have to face it every day, it doesn’t help at all If I ignore them and pretend they are not there. I haven’t been able to work with passion and do my projects since then. My emotions and energy are deteriorating slowly, bringing me into dark states and self-destructive thoughts; it passed already 10 years, and I haven't done anything about it. This is a frustrating and lonely experience, but I manage to find a way to recover myself.

I need a break; it has burned me up for a long time, and I need time to myself, which I desire for a long time.

It is a painful road wrought with grief, and I’m sure I have hurt many of my friends in while I lashed out. I can’t begin to say how sorry I am. This mental state causes me to lose sight of people who care and fills my head with lies, causing me to distrust everyone. As a result, I’ve chosen to isolate and focus on myself to try to get better. I do not see myself returning for a while, possibly after the new year. I’m sorry if I’ve cancelled an invitation from you, I'm sorry if I didn’t listen up closely... I’m deeply sorry if I wasn’t on a good shape and trying to hide it pretending everything is okay. I know I worry many of you, but trust me that I’m stable. I’ll be okay... I hope.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you for caring about me. You don’t know how much it means to me, even if I’m totally blind to it. I am constantly reminded by everyone that they care, and it helps so much.

I wish all of you beforehand, have a wonderful holiday season with your loved ones, a good chocolate cup (whatever is your preference), and most important, stay safe.

So, what about the future?

I have so many ideas in mind and much to show you and all I need is time to start them, I have been practicing and doing experimentation for so long. Also, I’ve been working on a project for over 3 years now, but unfortunately I cannot reveal anything right now, the time is closer and closer and I hope you will like it. Stay tune about it!

This will be the project in which I have dedicated so many hours of work behind.

I will leave this message up for 24 hours for people to read before I disappear once again. If you send me any DM’s, I’ll try to get back to you before tomorrow.

Once again, thank you, everyone, for everything.

Khalek.