Дневник с Крузенштерна, год 2002-2003. Часть двадцать шестая.

Negentiende van Mei, Maandag (19 of May 2003, Monday)14.42 I did it! I wished You sweet dreams (look two lines up) and You did it. But my hope came true too. I dreamed we were together and were going to photo exhibition (before it I have very nice feelings about You only) of Your pictures or not, I don’t remember. We came to big building with glassy walls like sky-scraper, and everybody could look from outside big picture in every window-room and some lesser picture around big one. But inside were a lot of cadets, who I don’t remember. And I wanted to go to toilette very much. I ran to toilette and started to piss and woke up. I started to piss in reality too. A little bit, may be I missed 3 or 4 liters, no more. Oh, no, I made a slip in speaking, 3 or 4 DROPS. Oh, No, No, NO!!!!! Now everybody will be speaking: “He made 3 or 4 liters into the bed. I don’t remember exactly, but I think four liters. Yes, four, I‘m sure.” What a shame!
Do You think it was nice dream? But it was very nice dream, I had very nice feelings in time and after dream with You.
22.43 I promised You to send message in the evening, but I don’t have good connection. I’ve been trying in during two hours. But my experience is saying to me that after 100 tries I will have success. I’m tried 79 times, soon I will send You my little love letter (little letter of big love) – LiLoLe.
We don’t have exact information about what we will do next three weeks. May be, we’ll convey all trainees and cadets to "MIR", which is next to us, and go to Kaliningrad or something else. Last two words mean very much cases. Tomorrow we will know, but ....
Today was sunny day. I took a sun bath, only wind was cold. I was standing face to sun, back to wind. Now I have brown breast and back with icicles.
No, You will not get my LiLoLe, PC for telex doesn’t work. But I wish You nice nice dreams tonight, and I will go to toilette before sleep.
Oh, in last 75 lines is no words about my love to You, my Princess. Al of my heart is going on looking forward of you. I love YOU very much, My Koshkatje, Mami of our family. Take care of you. I Love You.

"Мир" дрейфует рядом с Крузенштерном.

Twintigste van Mei, Diensdag (20 of May 2003, Tuesday)

08.50 Good morning, Koshkatje! Did You dream something nice? I dreamed about You, but not so much. We are in A Gulf of Finland – from starboard side is Estonia – Tallinn, from portside is Finland. I can hear by VHF radio station Finnish – lappola popappolla tikurilla pippilla.
I was awakening at 5 and tried to send mail to You, but without success. You are working today in Rotterdam, I thing, I can send message at midday.
15.15 I told on the bench in stern with Brigitte. She was in correspondence with you by sms. She said, with You very nice to have smsing (new word in English), because You’ve been answering right away. She sent sms to his friend and, may be, he will give a look to handy at evening. She is getting sad with present situation. I can understand she doesn’t want to go on "MIR" and to be alone in St-Peterburg, but what I can’t understand (what we can’t understand) – her relation with Jenia. On deck they are behaving like strangers. In Jenia’s room – the same. Twice I found them alone in kubrik speaking, it looked like trouble. They never smiled together. Where is Brigitte’s mind? I’m going tee smiling.
18.37 We came to first Russian land – Gogland island. MIR is next to island too. I sent rwo messages to You. Once You said, that mailtjes from me are going long time. No, I don’t think so. For example, I wrote message yesterday, but I could send it only today. And one more note – in message I indicate Greenwich Mean Time, it is three hours less, than ship’s time or two hour less than Dutch time. Sometimes I can’t send mailtje, when I want. But I’m trying don’t alarm You, My Koshkatje with beautiful smile.

Вечер у острова Гогланд.

Eenentwintigste van Mei, Woensdag (21 of May 2003, Wednesday)

08.29 Good morning, my Darling. Did you sleep good? Me too. This morning is very foggy. And night was without dark – it is famous White Nights of Saint-Peterburg.
22.36 Today was not easy day. Radio center didn’t work, trainees told me about them troubles because of Kruzenshtern – hotels and airplanes in St-Peterburg were ordered for 21 of May. I had a good relation with those trainees and we said goodbye to each other very warmly. Brigitte doesn’t know anybody in St-Peterburg and she was worried about her time in the city. I didn’t get message from You yesterday and couldn’t get something from radio center until 16.00. Continuous expectation and tension last two-three days of decision about St-Peterburg. But today was and nice events too. I climbed up on top of forth mast (bitsian mast?) for TV-antenna and took camera with me. “MIR” anchored next to us and I took a lot of nice pictures. One new sailor had a birthday today – I made nice 5 cables for him. And with message from You I got peace of mind and good mood for all troubles around me! You love me so much, that it is so easy for me – to live. To live in love, to live with love, to live and to know – You are thinking about me. I got from Kaliningrad and Gvardeysk no messages – I would feel myself lonely without you. Loneliness – it is terrible. I just want to say – I need You, You mean very much in my live, because I love You.
24th of May I will be in Kaliningrad and I will talk with you. Bye-bye for today, My Beloved Koshka.
1 minute later. I didn’t tell You – I shaved today first time after Hamburg.

Tweeentwintigste van Mei, Donderdag (22 of May 2003, Thursday

10.14 In day when we dreamed about each other, I wrote message “Are You ready for second series of dream?”. I couldn’t send it at evening, but next midday only. Time was lost and sense too. Therefore You didn’t understand. It is no good, that you have been getting my mailtjes one day later.
22.50 You don’t know about this, but in radio center telex terminal is broken. I can’t send and receive messages. But it is not so important. I can’t send LiLoLe to You and get Your mailtje. I miss You very much all day, but I don’t want to eat Zoete Mishkatje*. Therefore I studied Dutch, was in sport room (Big sack for boxing was beat a lot), did many little important things for work. You know, I’m with You always. And You with me too. Always.
23.59 I called You!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can go to sleep.

*Zoete Mishkatje - шоколадный медвежонок на чёрный день для поднятия настроения.

Drieentwintiste van Mei, Frijdag (23 of May 2003, Friday)
09.32 I looked in chart room into the ship book. In 2002 Kruzenshtern made 14916.2 miles! I didn’t know about it.
Oh, I’m in best physical and mental condition at this morning. I’m ready to move mountains, but only sea around me.
14.54 You know what is situation now? Chief mate called all sailors to mess room and said, that question about our arriving in St-Peterburg is deciding at present moment on government level, and it is possible, that we will go to St-Peteburg tomorrow without calling at Kaliningrad. Vlad sent message to his wife in Belarus “come to Kaliningrad”, sailors said to them wife “tickets to Peterburg turn in the kassa”, Brigitte will go back at home some early. I think, it is possible to decide it some early, normally, but... I’m so glad, that it is not so important for me, like for another people. I can go to Kaliningrad, I can go to Peterburg, I can drifting at sea till 21 of June.
23.31 Last three days a lot of people want to play with me game called “Holes”. If you see hole on clothes of somebody, you can make it bigger – it is meaning of a game. In order to avoid troubles don’t play this game with strangers and people without sense of humor. Now I have big hole on jeans-leg right under right buttock (with help of my friends; they are reckoning me having a sense of humor).
After dinner captain said that we will arrive to Kaliningrad tomorrow at 17.00 – 18.00. Can I trust him? Who can I trust?
I called to home, but nobody at home. Did You hear something about Gvardeysk in world news? How many questions for one evening... I will go to sleep, Iratje. I feel myself fine today. I exchange a little bit brown sugar for 6 pieces of chocolate. Mmm-mmm, CHOCOLATE:O))... With nuts... I’m your sweet Mishkatje. Good Night, My sweet Koshkatje.

Vierentwintigste van Mei, Zaterdag (24 of May 2003, Saturday)

16.19 When I came out from radio room yesterday midnight, I felt warm wind with smell of lilac and bird cherry tree. We draft next to coast.
Now Kruzer is going in the Kaliningrad channel. Weather is very nice and beautiful nature – everything is green with flowers. A lot of feelings I have inside of me – from gladness till commotion. I can’t explain it, chaos is into me. It is like I can’t go strait ahead, I must stop and wait.
Tomorrow I will be on ship on watch as sailor. And I will work as sailor in summer voyage, because will come new radio operator, he is my friend, we lived together in one room in house of cadets 4 years. I can send You mailtjes in summer. We are nearly come. I will call You tonight, Iratje. With Love, Your Kostechki.

Бочка для сжигания мусора на корме.